Would you consider it remiss of me to neglect my "More Rich Relationships" blog for a few weeks to build a stronger relationship with our 11 month-old grandson?
We have spent almost 3 weeks with him (and his mama and da), and I can honestly say that seeing an 11 month-old's big, joyful smile when he sees me coming is pure relationship heaven! His outstretched arms communicate a love and acceptance that nothing can surpass. I must be the most important person in the universe for him to want me to grab him up and gummy his tummy!
He is learning words. When he drops his spoon, he will now say "Uh-oh!" in his adorable way. Everybody replies, "Uh-oh!"
Important things in life are called by their first syllable, such as "ki" for kitten and "ba" for ball or baby or backyard. His parents have taught him some sign language, too; so now he understands that I know he wants blueberries. Likewise, he knows that he can have a bite of blueberry AFTER he takes a bite of some yummy squash with yogurt in it. We are understanding each other pretty well.
As I have said many times before, communication is at the root of any relationship, and an 11 month-old relationship is no different. When our grandson is tired or sleepy, he still cries sometimes to communicate his discomfort. I have learned that a little rocking and a soft song will communicate to him that he is safe with me and that I will try my best to take care of his needs.
It's also important for me to look for teachable moments, and to do my best to uplift that little guy anyway I can. When he bites something or someone he shouldn't, I must not get all worked up. I should just calmly and firmly tell him what the consequences of his action are. The first time I said calmly and firmly, "When you bite your mama, it hurts her," he looked like I had stabbed him and cried with dismay. The first time I responded to his demand for more blueberries with, "You have to take a bite of squash before you can have more blueberries," he looked at me trying to discern if I really meant if, but he finally opened his mouth wide for the spoonful of squash before gobbling down the blueberry with a huge, dancing smile. The first time he tightened up both of his fists and growled like a bear, I said, "Look what a strong boy you are,"
I can hardly wait to see him again. He will be older, and his communication with be far more advanced than it is now. It will be obvious, as it has been recently, that building my relationship with him will be a top priority, just as it has been in the last 3 weeks.
Thanks for a lovely visit! With love,
Nonna
Both of my parents were devout Methodists, and I grew up in that church. My mother was Director of Christian Education, organizing and training the Christian Education curriculum and activities in the church. My father used his Adult Education background to present "Can-Do!" rallies, encouraging churches in the area to organize and develop programs that met the spiritual growth needs of each church's members.